Best of 2011 by Jean Smith

1. Writing and editing an entire novel in the month of January as a reaction to losing my job and because the guy I was dating was too jealous to read any of my existing writing. I wrote a book for him. Excerpts of Obliterating History - a guitar making mystery, domination and submission in a small town garage can be found online (the thing with guy didn't work out).

1. a) As the years go by, I appreciate more and more that David's wife Wendy is helpful and supportive (instead of negative and jealous... see above).

2. Creating a stage adaptation to promote David Lester's graphic novel The Listener. Co-presenting events in book stores, libraries and classrooms, ending with a huge Indian buffet at the Bombay Palace near the airport in Toronto.

2. a) Monitoring the exciting reviews of The Listener as they rolled in.

3. Sharing Occupy Wall Street reports from musicians Rick Brown and Hamish Kilgour on Facebook. Intriguing new methods of agitation.

3. a) Being enthralled with Occupy as it began, grew and continues to change the way we understand the world.

3. b) Finding out that Occupy Wall Street originated at the Vancouver based anti-consumerist magazine Adbusters.

4. Borrowing my friend Duane's 1976 Ford camper van and going to Hornby Island for a week.

5. Taking my parents (ninety-one and eighty-six... ages, not names) for a walk in a special universally accessible pathway in Golden Ears Provincial Park. Later, we sat in the car and ate the sandwiches mom made.

6. Basically completing a second novel. The Black Dot Museum of Political Art is about the CIA tainting of abstract expressionism and the cure for narcissism.

7. Email exchanges with Brett of M'Lady Records. Exceptional. Promising.

8. Being included on Tobi Vail's Top Ten List in Artforum Magazine.

9. From April to August I dutifully underwent a series of tests that, as the daughter of a breast cancer survivor and someone labeled high risk, I have come to accept are part of the deal. Core biopsy, needle biopsies and finally, surgical biopsies with nearly a month delay in getting the results because the surgeon went on holidays. It was during that time that I borrowed the van and left town. Fuck waiting. Fuck cancer. It was that beautiful first week of September. I camped alone, made espresso on a hotplate, laughed, rode my bike in a floppy hat and sundress, swam in the sea and used the oven door in the van as a desk for the laptop, up early to write every morning. When I finally got the all clear, I jumped around a bit and then proceeded with the day as usual. Watching my mother go through a radical mastectomy when I was ten (she was fifty) set me on a course of cramming as much into life as possible. When, upon receiving the good news, all one really wants to do is get on with that day's writing, one knows one is on the right path.

9. a) Fuck allowing fear to fuck up one's life.

10. Knowing for sure that if something did go wrong, that I have for sure packed at least three lifetimes worth of everything into this amount of time already. In the latter part of 2011, savoring the excellence of being fifty-two years old without any problems what-so-ever, I took to telling people "I am happy." No touching of wood, no fear of jinxing it. I am happy.

New Mecca Normal 7": Malachi b/w Blue Sky & Branches

here's another new record I look forward to hearing:



From today's edition of the Mecca Normal newsletter:

Malachi b/w Blue Sky & Branches – part of the International Pop Underground singles series. Malachi is about free speech and anti-war activist Malachi Ritscher (1954-2006).

Mecca Normal is launching our 7″ by inviting bands to cover Blue Sky & Branches at their shows in the months of November & December. We will post videos of cover versions on MySpace.

The Black Wedge Tour, 1986

Jean Smith on The Black Wedge tour:

"Touring the west coast in 1986 opened our eyes to a whole different underground, a whole new punk rock. Everywhere we visited we met artists, writers, musicians and activists with a DIY aesthetic and their own methods for making things happen. It was a challenge for us, could these berry-picking, pie-baking kids organizing dance parties and swimming hole picnics be political? Everyone happy, picking up instruments to join in the fun. Us with our smash the state ferocity, and them with a bag of marshmallows and some extra sticks."

Read more

It's hard not to think she's talking about Olympia here!

Man Thinks Woman When He Talks To Me

Be sure to check out today's Magnet piece by David Lester and Jean Smith from Mecca Normal. Jean wrote a cool short story about a struggling woman writer in a male dominated literary scene who finds herself doing traditional "women's work" at the book store readings. It's a thoughtful, well written piece. This is a part of a weekly series they've been doing, today's edition also comes with a free MP3 of Mecca Normal's classic feminist story-song Man Thinks Woman performed live in Toronto, 1987.

Before I had studied feminist theory or read much women's history, Jean Smith's song lyrics were one of the main sources for feminist analysis in my life. I first saw Mecca Normal when I was about 16 years old, it was 1986. They were in Olympia as a part of The Black Wedge tour, which was a group of anarchist writers and musicians traveling down the coast in DOA's old school bus. Jean's songs and voice spoke directly to my experience as a female. When you suddenly find yourself a teenage girl, the double standards imposed on you are unacknowledged yet psychologically devastating. Not only are you dealing with overt sexism, which is a little easier to understand and address, but also the insidious cattiness between girlfriends, the subtle monitoring of your body/sexuality by boys/men and then there's your own self-sabotage and competition towards other girls/women or what feminist theorists called "internalized oppression".

As I was slowly piecing together all of this, without a language to view it as systemic, in comes Mecca Normal, with their stories about women living under patriarchy. They provided a way for me to view my own personal experience of female adolescence as political. Even more amazing, 26 years later, they are still working artists and their work has consistently done this kind of thing--they use storytelling, sound, light, texture and image to examine the world politically. In doing so, they help us locate our own experience in terms of power. This kind of political art creates space for resistance.

For example, Bikini Kill was heavily influenced and inspired by Mecca Normal. We wanted to create a feminist youth culture so that girls could resist. But in order to even have the idea that maybe we could change things, we needed a political analysis of how capitalism and patriarchy impacted our lives as young women. Mecca Normal helped us see that and actively encouraged us to find our own voice and participate. Please check out their music and art if you aren't familiar with it.

Illustration by David Lester

From Magnet:

"Every Saturday, we’ll be posting a new illustration by David Lester. The Mecca Normal guitarist is visually documenting people, places and events from his band’s 26-year run, with text by vocalist Jean Smith."

A picture of me and my friend Heidi, 1985.

why I haven't reviewed yr record yet

so if you are wondering why I haven't reviewed yr record yet...two years ago I quit the band I was playing drums in...deciding, once again, that playing drums is not an end-in-itself for me...then spider and the webs went on a semi-official hiatus and I decided not to start any new groups until I prioritized some shit...one thing I wanted to do is stop playing in bars...and stop going to bars...which led to not hanging out with people who spend a lot of time hanging out in bars...so I did that...and I'm still doing that I guess...but it sorta meant I stopped playing music for awhile...and then I stopped going to shows...I haven't played a show in almost a year and a half, which might be some kind of personal record for me...when I'm not in a group or when I'm in a group that is not playing out I really don't enjoy going to shows...I get bored and I start to hate all the groups...by nature I'm critical and I enjoy and value criticism...but this is different...so I've been doing other things for awhile...I still play guitar on friday nights, but I'm not in a group, I'm not playing shows...I'm gonna start working on it more over the summer and I think that will mean I'll be more receptive to what other people are doing musically...really the only music I feel passionate about right now is a box of reggae records we got in columbus, ohio over memorial day weekend and the dum dum girls. ok, I listen to dexy's midnight runners a lot at the gym...like every day...and there are a few bands I'm curious about and a few other records I've been listening to here and there...hopefully i'll have something to say about this all later...and thanks to everyone who has sent me stuff to review...I'm gonna start listening to it next week for reals, to go along with my summer regimen of playing guitar every day for three months no matter what.

in the meantime here are a few songs that are sounding pretty good right now:

The Jigsaw Underground, 2009

Underground refers to music that has a different purpose and orientation than mainstream bands. Keeping underground as an ongoing description illuminates that there is an under to the over -- a distinction that implies motivations other than money and fame. To reduce underground to a description of current trends diminishes its potential power. I guess there are now indie bands on major labels, diluting the reason there were indie bands. Indie is now a genre where previously it was a stance. Maybe we'll have "undie" bands in the mainstream and the history of underground culture will likewise fade.

-Jean Smith, Mecca Normal

I started writing about The Jigsaw Underground as an entity in my fanzine Jigsaw around 1991. I would define it in each issue, but basically I would pick a different selection of bands to write about that existed for reasons other than "to make it big"....bands that I thought were culturally and/or politically significant...bands that symbolized what it meant to be independent or punk at that particular point in time. Looking through the back issues, this is something I was deliberate about from the beginning. Through the creation of my fanzine I hoped to be able to change the direction youth culture and punk was going. In the late 80's/early 90's when I started writing my zine, I felt a lot of people were into blatant marketing and career goals. Sub Pop symbolized this to me with their limited edition 7"s, insult-your-intelligence and tell you what to do ad campaigns and "professional" looking logo/graphics. From today's vantage point, it's a little hard to refer to what I was thinking at the time without writing a whole essay about it, but hopefully you can get the picture.

When I decided to start Jigsaw as a blog version of the fanzine one of the things I wanted to focus on was the "underground" part, particularly because of how the internet has changed things. Like Jean Smith, I don't think the idea of an underground has lost relevancy just because the internet has changed how we access information. I think the concern now, is to get people in bands to stand for something and to stand together against multinational corporations, global capitalism and consumer culture. How can we use independent-punk-underground music culture as a site of resistance? How do we define ourselves in opposition to the mainstream, when the mainstream is everywhere?

One of the challenges that I see in this era, as both a working musician and someone who works at an independent record label, is rooted in economics. On the one hand, I resisted turning punk rock into my job and try not to approach music from a careerist or commercial standpoint. On the other hand, as someone who has toured extensively and is dedicated to distributing independent music world wide, I want working musicians to be able to make a living wage and get health insurance. This is a tricky issue, because it involves capitalism, market forces and art making and so there is going to be some degree of compromise involved. Some would say there are irreconcilable contractions at work. But I don't think that just because bands are forced to navigate economic concerns we should abandon ethics. Part of this is about supporting touring bands when you go see them by buying a T Shirt or a record as an ethos. Why do so many people think it's totally ok to spend $20 going out to dinner and $20 on drinks and then totally freak out when they have to pay more than $10 to go to a show? Make a sandwich! Drink another night--or not at all, how's that for radical! Put your hard earned money back into the community don't fund the consumer bar culture and support the beer and cigarette companies. Let's make economic sustainability a value to work towards, something similar to "buy local", but in this case "buy underground music", "pay generously to see touring bands" "fund independent culture"...you get the drift.

I strongly believe that if there are people who are listening to your music and coming to see your band live that you should be compensated for your work. I also believe that you should not have to sign to a corporately owned major label in order to do so, especially not today, with digital music being a growing percentage of total sales. Of course with free downloads, it is harder for bands live off of royalties. Unfortunately, economic reality has made it difficult to make money on tour as well. This is largely because although the cost of gas, food and lodging has increased exponentially in the past 20 years, punk bands are still expected to charge the same amount at the door--locally, under $10, usually $4-$6. In Olympia it is actually really hard to get people to pay for shows at all because there are so many shows happening all the time and a lot of them are free. While on one level, this is really cool, it has a real, negative economic impact on touring bands. (Incidentally, this is largely the reason most bands that are trying to make a living off their music skip Olympia on tour, no one can get paid enough here to make it worthwhile.)

When asked about the economics of touring as an underground band today, Ian Svenonius (Chain and the Gang, Make Up, Nation of Ulysses) said:

I guess touring is harder now but I also think maybe it was always pretty untenable. Unless you're the hot band of the moment, its pretty ridiculous proposition. Four or five people hauling gear around in a van hundreds and thoudsands of miles to perform something that, by its own design, can be made by anyone (i.e. "punk"). The big diffrence now is that so many bands are touring all the time and that so many have promotin, tour support, and publicity or are internet savvy (i.e. phenomenon bands like "Wavves") in a way that some of us are not. But yes, the punk politics have disappeared but the inherent cheapness of that scene is still with us (i.e. everyone wants everything for free).

This begs the question, how do we change this, how do we bring "the punk politics" back or update it for the present/future? What would that entail exactly? What is our political platform? What needs to happen? What tools do we have available? What do we want to change? How can things be improved?

When I asked Jean to clarify what she meant in her original quote when she said "the history of underground music will continue to fade" if underground becomes another mainstream marketing category, she replied:

The history of the word indie continues to fade. People who hear it, and use it, forget that it meant independent from major labels. Now indie is mostly a description of a sound, like alternative is a description of a sound rather than an alternative to how the music industry operates. Alternative was a description of the way bands operated -- putting on shows, working with a label to get your music out as opposed to being a rock star on a major label with staff to handle such details. Both these terms -- indie and alternative -- have been assigned new meanings that relate to the descriptions of the sounds associated with them. I'm sure if there were "undie" bands it would almost immediately turn into something to do with underwear. Bands would play in their underwear. Calvin Klein would start making music videos in its newly formed record label division. The history and meaning of underground culture would no longer be there when the word "undie" is used. I don't believe people think about independent culture, independent from major labels and corporate concerns, when they hear the word indie. Grunge is a sound and a look -- perhaps a city and a handful of bands. Indie is a political stance whose history is being replaced by a sound, a look and an era.

I am tempted to make a joke about Hawnay Troof, who often do play in their underwear, as a proto-undie band here...I can imagine people writing dissertations on the intersection between "undie" and riot grrl based on outfits alone...but what I'm seriously getting out of this discussion so far, is that "underground" is now, more than ever, a political stance more than a location. If that's the case, let's keep talking about what it means to be "an underground band"... the interactive nature of the blog format makes it possible for us to talk about this here in the fanzine at the moment it is being made. I am happy to provide a forum where we can have this conversation.

I leave you with this encouraging statement from California based punk singer Robin Indar (Black Fork, Severance Package) about how touring in a lot of ways is easier now than ever before. I also asked her what it was like to go on tour as parents:

Well, from what I've seen, there's not too many people out there in our predicament (parents of two/ rock n' rollers) but I know of at least one couple here in town that does, but they're at least ten years younger. Without the added chaos of small children, I would say touring is easier than ever. You can post flyers on the internet instead of mailing them or hoping people will post them in their towns and you can make flyers easier, faster and in color (ooh!) without having to know someone at the local copy shop. Most of the booking can be done online as well so you save on all of those long distance phone calls from hand written wads of paper your friends lent you from their last tour. I'm especially fond of the option of burning a CD demo in 20 seconds versus dumpster diving old cassette tapes, covering the holes up and recording over them so you'll have demo's to sell at the show. We used to get the occasional customer that would return saying "that demo I bought was all psycho Christmas rap songs".
I've been really surprised to see bands on tour with van rentals that have GPS systems. That was completely unheard of ten years ago. Think of all of the combined hours of lost punks driving around on the wrong roads. For those without GPS, there's always google maps which will give you the exact directions, and weather.com to tell you exactly what to expect weather wise and what the road conditions are. Basically, anyone who complains about tour being hard in this new century is either riding a donkey with an amp on their back or they just have no idea how hard touring USED to be.
The only thing different for Josh and I, and any other parents out there rocking together in a band is that you have to have someone to watch your kids while you're away and you have to work with their school schedule too. Even our drummer Steve, has a teenage daughter so we're a pretty unusual band as far as responsibilities go. The van is too small to bring anyone but us at the moment so luckily, my mom has gone beyond her call of duty in taking the boys while we attempt small tours. She can even call us on our cell phones should the need arise, oh what I would have given for one of THOSE 15 years ago when we broke down in the scalding hot Arizona desert!

ok thanks to everyone who participated in this week's discussion about what it means to be underground in the digital era. you can read my earlier post here.


coming soon: interviews with marissa magic & joey casio

Happy International Women's Day: Attraction is Ephemeral by Mecca Normal

Attraction is Ephemeral (Kill Rock Stars, 2006). A self-portrait film by Jean Smith.

Best of 2008 by Jean Smith

The things that make 2008 significant



1. David and I Spontaneously creating artwork to auction off for Books to Prisoners when we heard we'd be playing in the $1 Books to Prisoners clothing bin at Dumpster Values in Olympia, Washington.

2. Getting out the bike I bought years ago at an opera society rummage sale. Riding to work and the gym -- not far, not fast, but fun and sometimes scary. A bike guy in spandex and helmet coming up the hill near the WISE Hall telling me "Go fast. Go fast. Just let go." Me, hands clenched, brakes squealing, saying. "No! No! No!" Pulling over at the baseball diamond, using my kickstand, and eating Chinese dumplings out of a Tupperware container, thinking -- life doesn't get any better than this.

3. The Silver Party's kudos on http://www.myspace.com/jeansmith blog where, to me, a kudo is an acknowledgement of the writer / reader dynamic. A kudo (don't like this word any more than blog or hiatus) doesn't interfere the way a comment can. A kudo is a mug of warm milk to the comment's dropped carton of skim pooling at my feet.

4. Playing guitar with Duane and having Singapore noodles, bbq pork and won ton soup at Happy King. http://www.myspace.com/jeanduane

5. Maintaining my blog as a place to put work -- in fact, creating and completing work because I have a place to put it -- stories, films, songs, paintings, poems and the work behind booking a tour, which I decided to make transparent, to demystify, by posting itineraries and communication with booking people and helpful D-I-Y enthusiasts. Posting the details of the booking process also created a sense of accountability for me. There are lots of good reasons not to go on tour, but they just don't wash in the big picture. Appreciating very helpful responses from clubs who have booked us for our April tour in the USA.

6. Becoming pen pals with Lenny Kaye who commented -- "I have not been able to get beyond your solo album, play it over and over again... truly mesmerizing".

7. Mecca Normal -- my ongoing music, art, political and literary adventure with my excellent creative partner David Lester. Twenty-five years intending to inspire, instigate, inform, amuse and agitate in the underground.

8, New Mecca Normal songs about war protester Malachi Richter and One Man's Anger -- understanding that sometimes anger is pain and the fear of pain. http://www.myspace.com/meccanormal

9. J Free of Sonic Archives -- recorded two Mecca Normal shows, made CDs and sent them to us along with many collected recordings including a live version of I Walk Alone from SF in 1994. Turning this and many other songs into short films.
http://www.myspace.com/jean_smith_films

10. Walking and running to work at The Store where good conversations happen with customers and co-workers. Learning about eco-friendly clothing -- bamboo, hemp, organic cotton and soy. The Store is closing at the end of February due to the economy. I will be unemployed, focusing on Mecca Normal -- recording and touring with "How Art & Music Can Change the World" http://howartandmusiccanchangetheworld.blogspot.com which we've been presenting for about five years in classrooms (university, art school and high school), art galleries and book stores. We intend inspire audiences towards self-expression, encouraging them to consider political content in their work as opposed to the concerns of status and money. Basically we set up an art show -- or use PowerPoint -- and we start by introducing ourselves, explaining why we maintain our creative partnership in its many forms -- what motivates us. David talks about the long history of art in social protest. We speak about each others artwork -- David's use of text in his poster series Inspired Agitators and my abstract expressionism -- a balance to the word-based lyric and novel content I create. At about the twenty minute mark we do three or four songs pertaining to what we have been discussing. We continue discussing the various political ideas we bring into our work -- women's rights, poverty, war protest -- relating the issues to our own experiences. We wrap it up with a few more songs. The updated version of the event includes a vision to convince the populace that it is necessary to protest and create conditions that are favourable to support the work Obama is faced with -- otherwise, without support in the form of popular protest and activism, the right wing will rip him to shreds. People must, state by state, community by community be ready to participate as activists rather than sitting back to see what Obama does.

11. Christmas morning -- 4 a.m. -- I started booking the April 2009 tour and got responses right away, including a confirmation for "How Art & Music Can Change the World" at Bluestockings Books -- a feminist book store in NYC,

12. December 30, 2008 -- dinner and a fine conversation with an old friend about world affairs, inspiration, Howard Zinn, political and cultural activism and how to take the opportunity to encourage progressive social change. http://howardzinn.org/

"Why would I believe a politician?" -- Howard Zinn

"We must not have war any more." -- Howard Zinn

"The American people want health care, more like Canada's." -- Howard Zinn

13. Noticing how natural acoustics of rooms impact energy, thinking, mood and willingness to converse. The Store creaks and clomps, all wooden and warm. Understanding more about memory and history -- wild things that resist being captured.

14. August. Deciding to not go forward with a man who met my requirements as stated in my online profile. Handsome guy, my age, six feet tall. Thin, muscular body -- nice hair. A non-drinking condo-dweller with a car. No pets, no roommates. He was into weirdo-music and punk rock -- he'd heard of Mecca Normal !!!! He was a hiker, a painter, a short story writer, a filmmaker learning to play guitar. He wanted to find a partner, but he projected all his wanting and finding stuff onto me. We were, as far as he was concerned, in a relationship from the moment we set eyes on each other. I kept telling him to slow down, but he didn't see why. Week three he said we'd been together a month and I had to tell him it had only been three weeks -- it was a relentless escalation of relationship. When I said I needed to stop, I was accused of destroying his fantasy -- he got angry with me for ruining everything, but he apologized and said all the right things and promised to slow down and off we went again, but, soon enough, the end arrived. Why didn't I jump at the chance to be with a good looking guy who was into what I'm into? He listened to me talk about writing, offered ideas. He was super attentive, regularly dropping to his knees to profess his adoration, telling me how much he appreciated my body and my mind and my sense of humour and my clothes -- telling me how beautiful I am. He couldn't stop kissing me. But he represented someone willfully misunderstanding me, actively refusing to know me, in favour of pounding into my life with a box called 'relationship' for me to climb into. Which, as a way to approach life, is the essence of the insanity.

15. David donating royalties from his book The Gruesome Acts of Capitalism, in my name, to the Centre for Victims of Torture in Toronto.

Mecca Normal recorded live; film by Jean Smith

This Comforting Thing -- Battle Ground


jean smith writes songs about what it feels like to be a woman in a male-dominated society. her art is truly necessary to me, in a way few things are. she had an enormous impact on what was to become 'riot grrl' in the early 1990's and is still writing great stuff.

recently, i posted some of my old go team tour diaries from the 80's; a west coast tour from 1987 with mecca normal, spook and the zombies and rich jensen and a u.s. tour from 1989 with mecca normal and some velvet sidewalk.

for more mecca normal, start here